how's life?

NEXT PHASE OF LIFE!

BRING IT ON!

I miss school.

February

IT’S FEBRUARY!!!

I am kinda looking forward to my next phase of life~ It’s probably going to be awesome to go through shit together with new buddies (doesn’t this sound just like high school).

And just glad that I am finally moving on to pursuing my interests. For somebody who was really lazy and always content with the present, it is really an achievement.

It’s a start. I’ll begin to chase my dreams, albeit six years late.

Just another day

Let me tell you a little about the truck driver you just flipped off because he was passing another truck, and you had to cancel the cruise control and slow down until he completed the pass and moved back over. His truck is governed to 68 miles an hour, because the company he leases it from believes it keeps him and the public and the equipment safer. The truck he passed was probably running under 65 to conserve his fuel. You see, the best these trucks do for fuel economy is about 8 MPG. At almost $4.00 per gallon, well, you do the math. And yes, that driver pays for his own fuel. The load he’s under needs to be 1014 miles from where he loaded in 2 days. And he cannot fudge his federally mandated driver log because he no longer does it on paper, he is logged electronically. He can drive 11 hours in a 14 hour period, then he must take a 10 hour break before resuming driving. And considering the shipper where he loaded held him up for 5 hours because they are understaffed, he now needs to run without stopping for breaks to make his delivery appointment. If he misses it, he will be rescheduled for the next day, because the receiver has booked their docks solid, as they have cut their staff to a minimum. That means the driver sits, losing 500+ miles for the week. Which means his profit will be cut, and he will take less money home to his family. Most of these guys are gone 10 days, and home for a day and a half, and take home an average of $500.00 a week if everything goes well.

You can’t tell by looking at him, but 2 hours ago he took a call informing him that his only sister was involved in a car accident, and though everything possible was done to save her, she died. They had flown her to a trauma hospital in Detroit, but it was too late. He hadn’t seen her since last Christmas, but they talked on the phone every week. The load he is pulling is going to Atlanta, and he will probably not be able to get to the funeral. His dispatcher will do everything possible with the loads available from Atlanta to get him there, but the chances are slim. So he has hardly noticed your displeasure at having to slow down for him. It’s not that he doesn’t care, he’s just numb.

Everything you buy at the store, everything you order on-line, moves by truck. Planes and trains can’t get it to your house or grocery store. We are dependent on trucks to move product from the airport, the rail yards, to the stores and our homes. Every day good, experienced, qualified drivers give it up because the government, the traffic, and the greedy companies involved in trucking have drained their enthusiasm for this life. They take a job at a factory if they can find it, and are replaced by an inexperienced youngster dreaming of the open road. This inexperience leads to late deliveries, causing shortages and higher prices at the store, and crashes that lead to unnecessary deaths on the road. It is even possible that is what led to the death of this driver’s sister.

This is a true story, it happened yesterday. The driver’s name is Harold, and I am his dispatcher.

Published: StarTribune August 3, 2011 

This story struck me.

And it’s these stories that let us better understand what others are going through.

(Source: stormbringer23.deviantart.com)

January

And, January just left us behind. 11 more months to make this year count.
Let’s roll.

P.S. It’s perhaps a good thing that unknowingly, time has crept away. At least, it means I was having such an enjoyable time then, that my mind didn’t have to bother occupying itself with the abstruse notion of time.

2013

When it is a new year, we like to come up with long lists of resolutions and aspirations. Most of the time, we end up not completing what we have set out to do. But we do not stop believing. Believing that this year will be the year we have always anticipated, that this year we would do something great. It is as though the previous year didn’t happened, or we are given a second chance to set things right. Even though we have failed again and again, we still believe in ourselves. Every year, we start afresh on a clean slate. Just one day, one year, we’d become the supermen we wished we were, and pull off those crazy things we thought impossible. Just one year. Perhaps, this year.

Let’s start everything afresh. Without the regrets and past follies.

That feeling when you make somebody’s day. Gotta remember that. Been a while since I felt this way.

Perhaps it’s time to pen down stuff before I forget what matters again.

Sigh. I don’t understand why anyone would ever do such a thing. It’s kinda sad and chilling when you read about the victims. These people were going to have amazing lives to lead, happy stories to share. And I can’t imagine how the parents and the school are going to relate this story to the other kids in the same school or neighbourhood. Just what are they supposed to say? It was an unfortunate event? Your friends have migrated to heaven?

Nowadays, when bad shit happens, we seem to only look at the number of casualties, the economic damage, or ‘collateral damage’ as the media quips. Somehow, I feel detached from reality. It’s like reading a map - you see the features and landmarks, but you will never know how is life down there. I tend to forget what such stories really entail. A few dead doesn’t mean just that.

http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/12/16/remembering-the-victims-of-the-sandy-hook-elementary-school-shooting/?xid=rss-topstories&utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+time%2Ftopstories+%28TIME%3A+Top+Stories%29

meh

WHEEE it’s time to rant! Haha one day before I’m eighteen so gotta be immature while I still can!

Here’s the pretty uninteresting story about why I am not going for prom in the end~

My family isn’t really well-to-do and we are kinda still in debt. But in spite of that, we have been able to get by and I had the liberty to be a normal kid, going for faculty outings and watch movies. But I still try my best to be considerate and not spend too much on superfluous things, or things that could wait till I have my own means to get them.

The conundrum came when they announced our prom and I realized I am pretty much going to dump at least about $250 if I were to go for prom, just for a single night of photo-taking. And from past experiences, I would be awkward at such events and have unwilling conversations with others as I see them party or trying hard to have a great time. Haha idk lah, but generally I don’t like to be around crowds. The only reason why I enjoyed myself during batch dinner was because I had awesome company - 4s4. Hmm, this time round I wasn’t able to convince my circle of friends to get a table ourselves and that means I’d be with my class. I’m not saying my class is bad or anything, it’s just that half my class isn’t going and I’ll have to sit with the guys and like 11s74 people. Doesn’t sound like fun to me meh. :/ And it didn’t seem to me that seniors were enjoying prom last year.

But, there was still this desire in me to go for prom, because I knew I would feel sore from missing out on the photos, and even if I wouldn’t have fun with my class, I could always find my friends to hang out with. Hmm at the end of the day, I knew I wanted to go heh. I mean, this time round it’s really the end of these 2 exciting school years for real. Can still recall Sylvia saying, “go there for the photos!” Sounds pretty ludicrous, but it’s true hmm.

I think sometimes life likes to take a shit on me though. Just when I have finally decided, alright I’ll just go, two sad things have occurred. 1, my phone’s screen was literally smashed by a basketball. Honestly, this was totally my fault. Left my phone in a vulnerable place. I was being fucking dumb. Still pretty angry at myself for that incident, and feeling bad for making my classmate feel guilty about it. Well, the phone was pretty new and my father bought it. Not good game when I would have to be asking my dad for money. Had a dilemma and wanted to keep my father in the dark about this matter. After a short while, I decided it was time for me to grow up and just tell him the truth even if he would be damn pissed at me about it. I was never on close terms with my father, but this matter pretty much exacerbated things. I was fine with leaving the screen as it is (it’s still cracked now ahaha), but considering how things turned out, it was practically impossible for me to ask money from my dad. He has had enough dealing with issues at his relatively new job and his retarded son for spoiling a new phone. I didn’t want to incur his wrath. So, nope I am not going to ask any money from my dad.

2, my sis just resigned from her job. That just means more money trouble for my family meh. And my mom had been whining about it, going on about having to tighten our pockets. (don’t worry, it’s not as bad as it sounds haha) Hmm, at that point of time, the atmosphere in my family was pretty bad. I was in a peevish mood because of incident number one. In the end, it was inevitable that I wasn’t able to get money to buy a prom ticket. In the meantime, I had managed to convince myself that prom wasn’t worth all that hassle. I mean, I’m not going to enjoy it because I dislike crowds, even in faculty outings I prefer to just stand in a quiet corner and enjoy the atmosphere, taking photos isn’t going to worth that $90 ticket, the performances are probably going to be retarded, two of my close friends ain’t going anyway (but retarded Kenneth lim bought a ticket in the end ahaha I bet his girlfriend demanded him to do that). SO I SHAN’T GO FOR PROM.

The irony is, I convinced Zhao Yong to go for prom haha. What a retard I am.

—-

Hmm, thinking about it now, honestly I’d want to go for prom. In the past, I had always prioritised hanging out with friends over money matters. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind spending any amount of money if it were to accompany my friends. I even worked during SITEX and definitely am able to afford that ticket.

AISHHHH I’ll defintiely feel sore during the actual day and the following days when I browse through the photos~

Haha but ah well things had already turned out this way~

It’s alright, really.

—-

WHEEEE from tomorrow onwards, I’ll begin to write in proper English! I’m just lazy heh and I’m sorry if all the hmmms, honestly, pretty gets on your nerves.

SITEX 2012

Took away much more than I had earned this time round. Hmm, I think I only sold about 9 - 10 laptops in total, which is better than most people in my booth but still pretty shitty as a whole.

First day I learned about how tough life can get. Seems like a lousy excuse, but honestly I am an introvert who’d prefer not to speak at all in most occasions unless I am around my inner circle of friends. And here I am throwing myself into an awkward situation where I am supposed to go through four days with total strangers and sell laptops to customers. But it’s only at such times when you are forced out of your comfort zone that you will actually learn a lot more about the world and about yourself. It was a day to warm up, grappling with the inconsistency between the nature of my job and what I am used to, learning about how to sell things. Sold only 1 desktop that day, and it was at a really discounted price. But fought really hard to earn that 1 deal, and I should be grateful considering most promoters are stuck at zero. Went home with dyling legs, feeling disappointed about my own performance. But oh hey, at least I made a few new friends.

Second day I realized things could really go worse. Sometimes, you work really really hard but you just don’t see any results. It’s really disheartening. Zero sales for that day while others had improved. The customers who had promised to come back to take a look again never came back and the deals that were almost clinched flew away. Just my luck (and partly my inadequacy in my abilities of course ahaha) meh.

Third day I was determined to make my day better. Well, it did turn out better, managed to sell 3 laptops and 2 of them were Alienware laptops (which meant much higher commission!). Hmm, it’s really your fortune if you find customers who had already set their sights on a certain product and all you had to do was to give an extra shove in the right way. But then again, you must be actively calling for customers and pulling them to your booth if you wanted to meet them. Standing by the alienware waiting for your lucky star to appear just won’t work. Had lotsa fun that day chatting with promoters from other brands too! It was pretty funny when people were just beingji hongand trying to flirt with pretty girls (whee there were quite a few la haha) ahaha. The crowd was really bad even though it was already the weekend and all of us were just merely ranting.

Last day was pretty meh. Hmm at least I had improved my persuasion skills and ability to bullshit the customers into buying the laptops ahaha. That being said, sales weren’t really good though, only sold 5-6 laptops in the end (lost count halfway). Even gave one deal alway and that guy just surpassed me in sales at the last 2 hours ._.

Hmm, really learned a lot of things these past few days. Learned from boss how important it is to take of the people under you. He’s really nice and takes care of your welfare. It was kinda entertaining watching him scold his customers for scolding the cashier because of a misunderstanding. Heard from other booths some of their bosses were really angry bullheads that just shit on them. I don’t know how to explain this, but you just enjoy working under such a nice boss and you’re intrinsically motivated to perform well. It’s important to take breaks, be more relaxed and crack more jokes from time to time. Having fun helps you to tide through bad times. Don’t ever blame it on bad luck, just try your best and if it’s not meant to be then it’s not meant to be. But you have to change for whatever is within your control.

Oh, and this time round, I have discovered a whole new side to Singapore. Well, some of my colleagues are delinquents. They are really nice people though, I mean if they didn’t say anything about such a side to them you wouldn’t have any qualms talking to them. Heard many many stories about their pasts and present. Hmm, I am just grateful I was raised in a nice family and able to study. It isn’t cool when you hear how people get shitted on because of their background or inability to study. Honestly, I’d say that they are nicer people than most in my school. At least, you know for sure they are genuine and sincere when they talk to. Somehow, back in my school, while I love it very much, most people whom I am acquainted with are usually hypocritical, whether only slightly or to a large extent.

Haha, it was kinda funny how shocked they were when they heard that I was from Hwa Chong. It’s incredible how society perceives us in such a way. While they did figure I was probably the obedient kind they’d never imagine I was from such a nice school ahaha. Well, I guess it’s pretty inane to work when you still have your ‘A’ levels going on.

Hmm, I really feel at ease around this group of friends I had made at SITEX. It’s wholly different from last year where most people were kinda hostile and even poached customers.

Pretty fun and meaningful experience. It’s great to try something new once in a while and take a break from studying. Last year, I was too fixated on my commission and didn’t manage to learn anything much, especially when I had my jc friend with me. This year, I just took it as a learning experience and had fun at doing my job. Bullshitting’s damn fun.

I’ll remember the nice meals, whining with promoters from the other booths, being in awe of the really good promoters, the feeling of exasperation, the awesome feeling when you suddenly sell two laptops in a row, or when a customer comes back after two hours and says, “I’ll take it”, the stories they tell me, the occasional joking and flirting.

I’d love to do this again someday, definitely.

Today will be fucking good.

Tough life man. Just remembered how gruelling being a salesman can be. Hmm sold one alienware desktop at least luckily. Tomorrow I’ll have to buck up and work even harder. Today was just full of near-misses and empty promises. My legs are just dying now and there’s still three more days gah.

Last year I made a mere 140 in commission. Though it was actually not that miserable as it sounds considering the basic pay and generous nice meals that were provided (I mean it still beats being a cashier or some other odd job), I am determined to do much more this time round. It’s just a challenge to myself, to be able to earn bragging rights of having a successful time at a job I’m totally not suited for. Have to say it’s an awesome learning experience that is humbling and proves that I have still a long way to go.

In all honesty though, today I really did what I could and well things just didn’t turn out as I’d like to.

Shall just rest and recharge. Tomorrow will be a better day. I’ll make it a better one.

Teehee at least I made a couple of new friends today. Much more sociable nowadays ahaha. Nice bunch of people.

Let’s go whee!